sorry for the absence

It happens to us all at one time or another, """"YOUR COMPUTER IS INFECTED WITH VIRUSES AND MALWARE"""" Scan now URGENT go to this web site to down load the latest virus protection, pay $97 to obtain the code to remove these dangerous programmes. There is no way I am going to pay some snot ridden crook who has infected my computer, I would prefer to throw the computer against the nearest wall rather than pay. It took some time but I finally mastered their programmes, starting as many internet programmes that try to log on such as Skype but first remove the plug that connects the computer to the internet, this slows the computer down so much that the malware programme also has trouble getting started, while I hurridly push the button that resets the computer to an earlier date. After resetting the machine, time to have a good old moan at Bill Gates and his cohorts, only to see that they are on the ball and have put on their main Microsoft site a free windows live onecare scanner and computer cleaner. Great it found the malware and cleaned my machine, and now it works quicker with less problems. Silly bit is we use windows live one care and have used it for years without problem. Going back through the history it transpires that while yours truly had to pop out to the shops, visiting grandchild noticed that grandma has dozed off, so it is safe to download that new superduper recently hacked whiz bang shoot em up computer game for free, but she has to disable our fire wall to get the programme, Any one out there want a 12 year old girl who has just learnt what the old fart was shouting about and finally realised that he could manage never seeing again. I lost alot of sleep over this problem as I am so careful, and taking advantage of granny grabbing a few winks took the biscuit. Microsoft report says that this type of malware is very prevenent lately which is why they are offering the free service. If you look up the following using your search engine and clicking on the Microsoft example will show you what we have been dealing with and may just frighten you enough to double check on downloads. first is pws:win32/prast!rts, two is win32/winwebsec, three is renos.jl and finally js/renos. my sincere hope is that the spotty oik who wrote these malware programmes becomes very ill finding it hard to breathe cos my foot is pushing on his/her wind pipe!!!

Ruddy Cheek

Hi all, I'm Bosun and I'm not that flee bitten dirty stopout cooking fat's mum, I'm human, 16 years old and really cute, now all you cats out there be afraid, yes thats right pussy those are teeth and although I have lost a few I can still do a bit of damage with whats left. Now you might think that I am a dog but you are wrong, and no I am not a chocolate bar, who in their right mind would call me a Yorkie, no chunks of chocolate in me, can't stand the stuff. To prove a point my main diet is chicken, roast beef, sirloin steak and the odd steak and kidney pie, my dad has to eat sausage and beefburgers and I get all the good stuff. Mum, Hassle the boss keeps me well fed with only the best cuts. I sleep in the main bed between mum and dad, yes I know, but you have to put the older ones in their place, that's my bed and I let them share it but only on the edge's. Now if there is an animal shrink out there the cat seriously needs help, I think that when she stays out all night, she takes drugs and unlike some politicians who claim not to have inhaled, she does, she comes home with all the local toms chasing her down the yard and I know for certain she takes that catnip stuff, probably snorts it like some common chav, she comes in rubbing herself against our legs like a common tart, spreading her fleas she gets from her cat friends, she is a tramp. I think that she needs to be pitied as she is not all there.
There she goes off again, probably wont be back until the early hours, come on you cat shrinks this puss really needs help, or better still get the men in white coats to cart her off to a rubber room, no not like that, it's your mind, now wash you mouth out

Confused Po Box 36 Animals Weekly

No consideration, just because I'm a feline, I do have rights you know. Stick a camera in my face and FLASH my night vision goes for a burton, can't see a thing for hours. First six months of my life I'm called Tommy, and now without even asking me they start calling me Tammy, talk about confusing, yes ok I'm a dirty stop out, and I like to party and come in at all hours but what can you expect from a dog. Picture below is my mum, well I think of Bo (Bosun) as my mum, but she is a he and looks nothing like me. When Hassle the Boss was more mobile we all used to go for walkies and I would chase other dogs and bunnies like you would expect from a dog. The local tom cat started calling round but I was having none of all that, us dogs like nothing better than chasing cats up trees and I would bark at them but it always came out meooow. I am a very confused animal and if anyone knows a good animal shrink then I would be grateful if you could point them in my direction. So what if I'm a delinquent, with my up bringing what more can the locals expect

And for the doubting animal shrinks below is our family shot by Hassle the boss on our sunday walkies some time ago. My mum Bo is bottom right with mums two brothers Cocky better known as Cox'un showing his rear as usual and up front Benny and me leading the way